Is This It?

John, Just up.but ‘this writing’ of yours is impressive in it’s truth and it’s accessibility. I got it right off. Everything rang true.
It’s Saturday morning , obviously, and we have a full agenda today. It is the last weekend before Spring performance(week)_ for our ‘K’.

She is at a sleepover and I have to go fetch her in a few, and
my wife,’M’, is just off to the clinic, and when that is over/
It’s off to the ballet school for a whole day of run-throughs and final adjustments.

‘Whiners never win and spinners never sit’_Means nothing really, but it just came up. Every word means something in the context of the presentation. Your thoughts were totally there.I got it. Your Dad was like m6y dad. he probably hasn’t changed a wit.
The humorous wisdom of the original thinker. Bemused by God’s tender mercy.
These men grew up at a high water point, before the sophistication of the buffoons had run so deeply…Now they are speaking of bulldozing large areas of once major cities, as in Flint, MI.,And Detroit, and hopefully D.C.. It’s not a good Idea/bad Idea…It’s the presentation. No care and consideration for peoples feelings and their outlook.

Oh! I get it we’ll be working on the collective farms, in those greenswards. Why didn’t_they say so. It’s like suddenly we’re living in one giant Tiananmen Sq. Bring in the outsiders to clean up after the last litter_didn’t take ‘the fix’.

I am at a loss for time, but you can see I also haven’t focused on the page…Your thoughts were so right on. I was going over to the text, when I brought it up_ IndubitableParadox had a visitor. Who could it be?It was Ron of Azron (your old friend). Anyway I love those conversations, too. And Rosie, and lizzie, and biggie t, and Sherry and n.lynn, and many others. To me one of the greatest part of blogging is on the comments page.

Because _That is where I live, when I have nothing to myself. That is why there is no White Lodge At my house. You have been hosting a great forum I would say and it has changed, but it is all still here, and it is getting a good-good run right now with your new postings. I am in ‘like flynn’. I have to go old bean. Out the door in two, so I didn’t get back to the post, but I will return sometime today and further enthuse my brain. Loved it TR

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by trust the rust (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 11:38 AM   (del)


The last paragraph would make a great communion/eucharist meditation. I will copy it and save and it give appropriate acknowledgement of its source.

‘Broken and Blessed’ – I think we come to a full appreciation of our blessedness by recognizing the full extent of our brokeness. I think this is why Saint Paul called himself the ‘chief of sinners’ – every great saint knows the depths of their depravity and the height of his redemption (note it was a cross high and lifted upon which our Savior died – let it not escape our attention)

good reflections in preparation for the feast awaitiing us on the Lord’s day

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by AZRON (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 12:01 PM

Ron: Check out Henri Nouwen’s “Life of the Beloved; Spritual Living in a Secular World,” Crossroads Publishing, 1992. He gave me the idea of riffing on brokeness, breaking it down into “taken, blessed, broken, and given,” referring not to divided peoples but to man’s broken nature. The first time I heard something like this image of the Eucharist was from a Passionist father’s homily many years ago that stuck with me. It is sublime. |<   <<   >>   >|

by John, the Squabbler (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 5:46 PM

John, I have that book – I have almost everything Nouwen wrote.. all of it worthwhile to collect and read and re-read.. thanks for the suggestion… I also heard Nouwen give the gist of this as a sermon at the Crystal Cathedral (Robert Schuller’s church) many years ago – he had just published ‘Life of the Beloved’

thank you for the reminder


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by AZRON (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 5:54 PM

Thanks TR. I had hoped to be comprehensible only after realizing that I had posted it. I wasn’t sure where it was going at first.

I’ve been back to The Paradox, following a CC from Ron that appeared in my e-mail and forgetting the context. I re-read all that had been written, regretting it not.

Here it is Prom Night. All my customers’ kids are dressed rather well. I just passed the son of one doctor who had broken down in Dad’s antique sports car with his date. What a memory that will make. And it’s pouring rain. By the time I managed to turn around somebody else’s Dad had come to his rescue.

Related to my post, tomorrow I appear in a story by Rudyard Kipling, taking my Buddhist (Rinpoche) friend into the mountains to seek a teacher who is a hermit there. She has no idea where in this particular town he is living, but she is bound and determined to inquire of the locals as to his whereabouts, fearing that she may be turned away. He has a repuation for making curt dismissals. Perhaps I will bring my son’s camera which he left behind and take some mountain pictures.

I trust in the people of this nation. Hubris will bring down the troublesome current regime in time, as I’ve predicted. People today are driven by sentiment but also the very strong desire to be left alone. In the case of the latter, only when they awaken to the fact that it is being threatened will they stir themselves to action.

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by John, the Squabbler (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 6:09 PM

As I was reading that one I knew it would appeal to you, Ron. It fits my most important requirement for non-fiction: brevity. I read it in one sitting. But it was nicely done. It is very likely that the Gospel reading which was connected to that Passionist’s homily that I remember so well was the Baptism of Christ. Nouwen reminded me that to live life in the context of knowing you are loved by God is at the heart of Recovery, so I also connected with it that way. |<   <<   >>   >|

by John, the Squabbler (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 6:23 PM

Nowness (sorry to make up a word) is missing from most Christians vocabularies – most are locked into the past or into the future. There is a place for memory – Gospel is about memory – but it is most of all about the present moment – this is the breath I am accountable for – this one right now… I will re-read … probably not today however.. 🙂 |<   <<   >>   >|

by AZRON (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 6:28 PM

Ron: Of course I absolutely positively have to learn Greek by next Tuesday, but I’ve marveled at the masterful transliteration apparent in “The Kingdom of God is at hand,” and I’m sure I’ve written on it in here somewhere. It isn’t “The Kingdom of God is coming,” or even “The Kingdom of God is imminent.” As Hahn points out, it was natural that the Jews should have been anticipating the worldly Kingdom of David – looking to the past promise for their future – but that there was no apparent shock the world didn’t come to an end within a generation or two after Christ it would appear that Christians understood very well this Kingdom is outside of time, always and forever, and at hand – here, right now; you can touch it. We are told to anticipate, and anticipating is something we do in the Present Moment, not something we have already done and not something that we plan one day to do. In that sense we could use more nowness, yes. |<   <<   >>   >|

by John, the Squabbler (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 7:14 PM

John – we have good intuitive connection – of course, that is what I meant by ‘nowness’ – eternal life is not something you get when you die – you have eternal life now! I learned this from George Eldon Ladd, professor at Fuller Seminary, through his book, The Presence of the Future. I am sure Hahn is familiar with Ladd’s seminal work in this field for protestants as Hahn studied at Gordon-Conwell seminary before converting to Catholicism.

When I learned this over 35 years ago it was a liberating idea….

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by AZRON (PM , CC ) on Saturday June 13, 2009 @ 9:39 PM

John,That treatise today, between you and Ron was quite impressive in it’s dimensions, and that it was not only here, but somehow got my blog into the mix_as a pseudo ‘mini white lodge’. I was happy to lend the exterior of the porch to your setting. Toe to Toe, every time I came in _there was more…both here, and there. I am so glad for a lot of things. Again… you and Ron, wow! very cool. Gotta saw logs now.
I can hear my daughter and her friend talking in the bedroom and ‘M’ has just now_ gone to bed. Did I tell you we are off line now…no TV.
Only_ to pop in movies. one movie tonight…’Hope Floats’ a nice little
John_there is more, but need to sleep. Good reading You and Ron today.
TR as always-Pretty okay
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by trust the rust (PM , CC ) on Sunday June 14, 2009 @ 3:31 AM   (del)

Yes, I enjoyed that too, TR. It was good to be able to set the record straight. I’m just an anonymous storyteller playing in the electronic etherworld with other anonymous players, or so I thought. Do I write about reality or things imagined? Do I write about what I really think, or am I in character? Who cares? That was never the point. But even here – even without ever meeting each other face to face – we form attachments. I hadn’t counted on that. I seek freedom from worldly ties, and yet…

My seeker after her Rinpoche has delayed our trip a few hours, and now she wants to stop in Oneonta to buy some flowers for an offering. Apparently, there are two lamas inovoled now. Women are a pain in the ass. They can be Buddhist, they can be Jewish, they can be Christian, they can be Muslim, they can be Hindu, they can be nothing in particular – they all have one thing in common: they’re a pain in the ass.

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by John, the Squabbler (PM , CC ) on Sunday June 14, 2009 @ 12:27 PM

G’day John. I have two sons as i think you already know.

The elder one is 29 this year and the younger is 27 soon. The elder of the two feels insecure sometimes and talks about it when it becomes a little heavy on his shoulders. He knows he’s our son and is always checking up to be sure that we (his parents) and he are ‘ok’. However, regardless of the insecurities he may feel at times, he is more than able to move on and make decisions that build and even when the decisions end up ‘not so great’ he finds the confidence to lean forward so when he slips or falls – he slips or falls forward somehow. He kind of reminds me of your father in his relationship with God.

The younger of the two is less likely to talk about his insecurities but his life reflects the unworthiness he feels. He will not let himself succeed often and doesn’t ever think, say or feel that he deserves much. People are given the opportunity to walk all over him and his life – he’s not worthy of better you see – they take all that he has and achieves and what they don’t get they spoil. He’s just not worthy. I can tell by the way he is with us that he believes we love him less, if at all. We are his parents after all and we do have a duty to raise him and accept him don’t we.

I tell and show often in large or small ways that i love him fiercely to no avail. He just isn’t worthy for some reason of anything quite so great and life giving. He is unable to accept it and so he (in his head but never in our hearts) is always not quite as acceptable as another – our relationship is different and thus he is not as loved as others.

John, does he remind me of you and your relationship with God?

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by Rosie (PM , CC ) on Monday June 15, 2009 @ 9:12 PM

John, i’m a little bit gutted after that comment. I feel a bit crushed and… helpless.

Please have a good day.

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by Rosie (PM , CC ) on Monday June 15, 2009 @ 9:14 PM

Very moving Rosie…I am thinking of this one, because We have two boys 29, this year, and one twenty-seven, so right on the money…I am considering their progress on these lines.

I will think on it and get back to you…and_They do not sound, unlike me, at the same age. It is about the relational experience of growing-up. Was there unconditional love _in the sense that love was without question the progenitor of all that met them at the door?
Did they believe you and your husband were strong enough to withstand the characterless acts of youth,when they are testing the waters and creating trials way beyond the necessary.
Were you driven to frustration. Hating is what_ not Loving_Is.
I have forgiven my parents, and I have promised myself to never reveal the broad scope of dysfunction in our family…and the pain I grew up with. Psychological abuse, that I understand now, but it was not comprehensible then. Just a manner of speaking and disappointment.
There are times, when I do little better myself.
True disappointment would be to never sort it out and to never make amends. I was not the perfect young man..I tested the limits… all the way.

Have to go…maybe, this was private between you and John…we are on his site. I will go where I go.. Want to help anyway. Listening to myself…I know I don’t go there any more. Take good care, Rusty

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by trust the rust (PM , CC ) on Tuesday June 16, 2009 @ 3:45 AM   (del)

Rosie, I can’t decide for another person what he will think of me so it is without relevance.

But I can say that each of us is loved by the same God without respect for who we are; His love letter to us – His death and resurrection – has already been written. But now we must write back. He has called us; we must answer. And we must do so not as somebody else, but as ourselves, whoever we may be.

Our life’s experiences may differ, characters – both faults and virtues, personalities, perspectives, etc. None of this changes anything about the nature of God. In fact, these things may be nothing more than “the chains I formed in life” to take a line from Dicken’s “A Christmas Carol.” But they may be used to the good, for our freedom – individuality – makes us alike to God, and truly His children.

As our approach to God continues, as our relationship with Him deepens, and we grow spiritually, the way He appears to us in His infinite majesty is bound to change as we get closer, just as anything on a distant horizon becomes clearer as we travel towards it, with details seeming to emerge that we could not see before.

I’ve described something of the way He appears to me from where I am in my journey. It is true that He is all loving like a tender kiss, but it is also true that His Divine Face is terrifying and His infinite power is awe-inspiring. These things don’t contradict each other in the nature of God. We may contemplate one today and the other tomorrow.

Really, the only wrong way to pray is not to try, and the only right way is to begin and then to continue.

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by John, the Squabbler (PM , CC ) on Tuesday June 16, 2009 @ 6:19 AM

Oh yes Rosie, and I think as parents the best we can ever hope to do is just exactly what you are doing, because it is God who teaches us how to love and without question you are loving. I hope there’s some comfort in that. It is an ideal, and life is not ideal. TR says it better than I do. But I also have two sons. |<   <<   >>   >|

by John, the Squabbler (PM , CC ) on Tuesday June 16, 2009 @ 6:30 AM

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